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Five-tier escalation from stealth assassin to sniper to spaceship laser to satellite grid to a robed sniper. Caption each rung and download free.
Download the blank Escalating Assassination Methods template to caption it yourself, or add your text right here in the editor above and download the finished meme.
Some plans start reasonable and end completely unhinged, and this template captures that arc perfectly. It opens with a quiet, professional-looking assassin creeping through pews, then a camouflaged sniper in the field, then jumps straight to a spaceship firing blue lasers at Earth, a satellite blasting a green targeting grid down at the whole planet, and finally lands on a cartoon figure in robes casually sniping from a rooftop.
It's the perfect shape for any joke that starts sensible and spirals into absurd overkill: minimum viable product to enterprise architecture, asking nicely to filing an international incident, a light warning to nuclear-level retaliation. Caption all five rungs and let the escalation do the comedic work.
MANFRED · SLUGBOMBER · AWSTORMY · MISSILE · CORRUPT Z · 2520WASTAKEN · THE_A_PERSON · CORRUPT0 · CORRUPT X · M28
them: you're 5 min late · me: sorry traffic · them: it's always traffic · me: getting defensive now · them: bringing up last time · me: bringing up THEIR last time · them: calling my mom · me: calling a lawyer · them: satellite deployed · me:
step 1: ask nicely · step 2: ask again · step 3: mention it in the group chat · step 4: cc the manager · step 5: cc HR · step 6: cc legal · step 7: satellite involved · step 8: international incident · step 9: UN resolution · step 10: this guy
reply to 'k' · reply to 'k.' · reply to 'kk' · reply to being left on read · reply to a screenshot of your text · reply to them posting about it · reply to their friends piling on · reply to the group chat vote · reply to the family finding out · reply to the group chat vote
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